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by Calebriorn on Dec 08, 2016 at 05:01 AM
I have at last found the time and reason to return to the journal again. Regrettably the last month following my return had not faired well for the company, much of my attention was spend on helping continue our efforts, in spite of our reduced resources. I had returned to Red Hall to find our numbers drastically reduced since before my departure, for a time it was only Radhril, Blorlo, and myself still frequenting the Red Hall. I had returned to new developments, as I had expected, Lady Radhril has taken an interest in the as of yet still cryptic means by which her ring was able to aid in destroying the orb which had caused us no end of grief. Her studies have led her to believe the ring forges in old Eregion may hold a clue, and I am inclined to believe she is right about it. To say nothing that in addition to finding the information pertinent to the matter at hand, Radhril and I have both agreed that any chance to recover knowledge of any topic is valueable enough for it to be a worthy goal in itself. As we speak, we are in the process of gathering kinsmen for travel, given the distance it is not a journey to be taken without a full compliment.

This was not the only matter of interest, just a few short weeks ago a woman from Rohan came riding into Redstable on some important business. She explained that she was seeking a comrade of hers who had been missing in the area. At this time the sad truth dawned on me that the person she was seeking was Ancthelm, who fell at our sides during the attack on our hall months ago. From what I gather she was betrothed to Ancthelm, and the grief evidentially came suddenly and harshly for her, I brought her to Ancthelm's grave and grave to cope. I confess, being a warrior as long a I have makes a great many things less painful, having to inform loved ones of a comrade's death will never be one of them.

Still, this woman, Ethelaisly by name, has proven to be made of sterner stuff, no sooner than she finishes mourning by the grave she has pledged to help us. She is now accompanying us on our journeys, and I welcome her gladly, to be honest the company needs all the help it can get considering recent events.

Most recent, and perhaps most relevant to the present however is an issue regarding our intrepid master Blorlo, recently he has received a letter from the mayor of his home town of Archet, a place he explains he has been exiled from for years now. The circumstances of this sudden invitation back home were mysterious to say the least, not to mention just slightly in the side of suspicious, and Blorlo requested our aid, support, and if necessary our backup should the worst come true. On our way to Archet we made a brief stop at the inn in Combe, to my astonishment we were received by a surprising number of our company among us, including the return of Lady Meriya, it bodes well for the future to be without a doubt. We arrived to find Archet recently the victim of what seems to be a very devastating bandit raid, and it was clear in the state of the town, as well as the suspicion of it's watchers, who stripped us of our weapons on entering the town. We met with the mayor, who upon seeing Blorlo insisted to speak to him alone. After some convincing he was persuaded to let Lady Radhril join them, I admit this was to great trepidation and regret on my part, for my concern over their safety led me into full fledged paranoia. I am just glad that there was no deception after all, I must not cloud my judgement in that manner again... Whatever happened between Blorlomand the mayor I do not know, but I gather it was concerning his family, if nothing else Blorlo apparently now knows that his mother and sister yet lives, and expresses interest in finding them, he will have the aid of the company in this matter, as always.

As I write this, we are camping out beneath the stars just outside of Archet, and now I must conclude here, my turn on watch will be coming shortly.
by Calebriorn on Oct 24, 2016 at 03:58 AM
By the Valar, how long has it been since I've done this? A century at least, or thereabouts, truth be told I I'm not sure why I stopped keeping a record of my journeys, perhaps I didn't want to remember those times? Whatever the case that page has turned, and now I must attend to the present, and I can tell that this band I have found myself on the side of, this red company's trials and hardships, triumphs and tragedies will need to be recorded somehow. I could not possibly compare to the storytellers of my own people, but I will endeavor to provide my account, that of the warrior to the best of my ability.

Now of course, I am not actually with the Red Comoany now, as my lord elrond has called me away to other duties for a spell, but I must admit I am anxious to return. Sitting here under the Rivendell skies, I am reminded of the promise I made to Radhril, one of my kin from the former Greenwood to show her the best spots for stargazing in the valley, I shall have to uphold that promise next time the company comes this way. I understand she has taken to working with Nantaena in having the red company rediscover it's lost lore, a worthy goal, one I only wish I could be there to support.

My sources inform me Ornessar has returned to Rivendell and resumed his duty to Elrond's army full time, just as well in my mind, Imaladris needs soldiers like him in these times. On that point, I continue to hope that Katrandil's lot in life is improving, our previous journeys no doubt were harrowing in ways I could not imagine for her, having control one's own body stolen in such a way, perhaps with her sister's return to the company's ranks that scar can at last have opportunity to mend.

I do not know why I am fretting over my companions so much, my instinct tells me they will all be well when I return, yet I hold myself responsible for their safety. I cannot allow such thoughts to compel rash action, but I fear being without comrades again. I am reminded of descent events, the Comoany was setting up camp and Radhril had asked me if I had never known peace in my life, I had replied that for me peace was time to prepare for the next conflict, while I do not believe I was wrong in that, I can see now that I have gone too long without companions to share either war or peace with, if the enemy is on the march again, I would have the Red Company at my side.
by Monbretia Umbridge on Oct 16, 2016 at 02:56 PM

The weather is closing in. The grey sky hides the stars and a sense of gloom pervades the North Downs the closer I travel north towards Fornost.


It was here Tindu’rin first came to my aid. A ring my mother also called Nyrnuial , twisted twilight, as she gave it to me the eve before my family sailed to Aman. It was the parting gift that drew most stillness and thought from all my family, because, well, some would call it a ring of power.

I remember Cleary what Mirien my mother said as she took it off her finger and placed it on mine.

“My own mother did not say what the power might be, so I cannot tell you what you and it will find. However, Iphannien, what is understood is that that any artifact made by those who bring to their making something of the arias of Illutivar and the Valar has a double edge. It is easily observed that anything which draws light will make a shadow. Such is the nature of these artifacts that were made in the times before. The wearer of such art need to understand the balance of forces. When something is taken it is also given when something is cast aside it is taken up. A gift can also be a curse. The wielder or wearer will be changed over time and so will the artifact. It is also bound to its bearer and the bearer bound to the artifact. Their fate entwined. Hopefully they will be in accordance both working in unison. This is part of the struggle to keep a balance between creation and desolation. So this gift, my dear, comes with a warning.”

Nan Belain, I saw her diminish as the ring parted from her. I remember asking her to take it back in my fear of her change. She shook her head and smiled at me gently “where I go I need this not for I go to the never dying land but you who stay here to bear the burden of withstanding Morgorth and his spawn will be in need of it.”

And she continued thus “ With this ring you will hold a part of me, a part of my mother and my mother’s mother her mother before her for it is very old and was made possibly by those who came to Aman in the time when the world was lit by stars alone.” And then she clasped me to her body. “ be safe my child, na lu e-govaned vin”

That is what I remember of our parting. The next day was full of crowds, cases, the docks, wheeling seagulls, fast footsteps, shouting and eagerness as my family looked towards the west, the east now behind them as they boarded the ship before it sailed at dawn.

As I travelled back East, I cast aside my child’s name Iphannien, and took up Radhril . I did not dwell over much on what my mother said as I had no reason to believe that the ring was anything but a fine wrought silver of different hues which sometimes caught the light and twinkled testament to its name.

That was until Fornost. Now I do not know what to think but I wear it still even though Calebriorn advised against it.

Now here I am inspecting ruins of ancient Anor so as to refill our library with knowledge.

To sleep now as the wardens of the north watch over this small campsite.

by Monbretia Umbridge on Aug 24, 2016 at 04:08 PM

Preparing for bed after a long kin meeting. Tomorrow I will rise with the sun.

It has been a couple of weeks since we returned from Imraldis. When we set off to seek revenge and our claim what is ours from Thalsori and the Numerian Sorcerer so quickly, as we could after burying Anctheim, I don’t think we realised how unprepared we might be to face the winter. Tonight we looked steadily at the problem and Nanteana the companies steward started the necessary plans to replenish our stores.

I suppose each to our own. Calebriorn wished to raid near by bandits. So did Katrandil. Both of them have hearts of a mountain lions but a want to put themselves at the doorstep of danger. Lady Arstelle, Nanteana and myself counselled against this. I don’t think Calebriorn will carry out this plan but I suspect Katrandil will petty thieve.

Katrandil arrived with a new female Dunedian who she claims is her twin sister. I suppose twins run In her family considering her own. She seemed shy and did not offer her name, nor did Katrandil. I like this not. Theogorn was very nervous of a stranger arriving at the companies refuge and hid under the great table. I am beginning to wonder if Theogorn suffers from some malaise of the mind.

Landy Arstelle gave the company a large bag of gold. She departs again for the Blue mountains as there is trouble there.

Calebriorn and Ornessa ( I was surprised to see Ornessa. He ignored me!) will treat with Elrond to see if they can aid us with ores which are abundant in that region.

I shall be busy. Planting what I can in this late season. Riding through the refuge, on my way to the meeting I did notice that the fields left fallow over the summer months have become wild with weeds. First thing in the morning I shall inspect them more closely. It may be that their still something remaining from the spring planting. In addition to this, it is likely Nanteana's letter to Maelina will also help.

I still think acquiring some goats would be welcome for their winter milk and cheese making. I may have an ally in this with Theogron who I saw was extremely partial to cheese.
by Monbretia Umbridge on Aug 23, 2016 at 02:46 PM

Olwen has been giving me a merry dance.

Yesterday afternoon just past the hottest time of day she started up and ran. She kept on galloping away from me in haphazard directions. She refused to come to my call. Running after her through the marsh I did not at first see what was upsetting her and then I noticed the bees. They were flying around and nose diving at her thicket.

Eventually as the sun was sinking over the westward hills I cornered her in some ruins. Then I saw a mouse. It was trying to burrow into Olwen’s thicket and was disturbing the bees. Olwen was exhausted and allowed me to give her a bowl of fresh spring water. I was lucky in being able to pick off the mouse and throw it far into the marsh, but I got stung.

I brought Olwen home and she settled in the spring below the house.

I spent an hour carefully scraping away the stings and venom sacks and applying chamomile milk over my arms.

I missed the kin meeting.

Today Olwen is calm and happily wading. I spent the day with her swimming in the spring and cleaning off the milk under the waterfall.
by Theogorn on Aug 22, 2016 at 05:00 PM
Finally, the time had arrived to make my audience by Galadriel. Days had passed, and I recovered more and more. I am afraid I will still be stuck here for some time, and compared to an elf I only recover slowly. I climbed on the talan of Celeborn, where she was waiting for me. I needed to take the long road, as I couldn't climbe on the silver ladders of magic with only one hand.

On the talan, Galadriel and I were not alone. The other elf who saved me was there, and Andraghil and Allyss were too, just like Celeborn himself. It was only from this Talan that I truely observed the beauty and majesty of the golden wood and of the largest of the mallorns. I almost forgot I was on a quite important audience. For some reason, they wished to talk to me. They wanted to know something, and so did I in return.

"Mae Govannen Théogorn, student of Amarthorn. How are you faring? Did Nestadon tend your wounds well?" I was astonished, for I had completely forgotten her voice, in which the power of the old elves hid. It arrived like a spell, and it took a while before I found my words in my dazling confusion. I stuttered.

"thank you for the service of your people, my lady. I cannot forget what you did for me. your elves saved my life and even sacrificed themselves!" Galadriel smiled to me, and I proceeded. "I am wondering many things lady, of men and elves and history. Why did you order the Galadhrim to take such great risks for a mortal, who will die as a day fly? And with such results as this, to the dead of your kinsman." This is scary, why is she smiling even more to me? "Théogorn, I have heard what has befallen Minathlang. Losdirith told me his account of the story, and I trust that he did not fall. He has greatly proven loyalty and skill to Lothlórien. He is good in deciding, at a quick pace, and even better in the battle. It wouldn't surprise me if he came back alive afterwards, and he would provide many benefits in this doing." Seriously, how can this be? "But...why? why did you send Minathlang and Losdirith? What do I owe you?"

"The golden wood owes you nothing indeed. But your tutor, Amarthorn, did prove his worth when he was young, a long time ago. And we couldn't pay him back for the benefits he gave to us. It would have been his will that we saved you, and we owe Amarthorn a lot. Even now, when he does not live anymore, he did train you and believed in your skill. And so do we."

I sighed and stuttered even more. I don't understand...What did Amarthorn what he never told me about? "I guess that's all I needed to know..." And it was here Galadriel disrupted me. He smile disappeared, and looked serious now. "But we need to know your account of the story. What did you see there in the dungeons?" This question surprised me. To be honestly, only darkness did I see. but of course, I know a lot as a prisoner, and Lothlórien must know what goes on there in Dol Guldur. "My lady, I didn't see a lot, but there were countless numbers of wargs and goblins and orcs. And many siege-weapons, built of pines. The fortress is not empty, but filled of evil, and they are ready to wage war. As I experienced, they have dungeons, and they are devoted to torture and kill. Although this doesn't look like much information, it is already huge on its own."

And so Galadriel replied, the mysterious smile reappeared. "Don't worry to be sparse on information, randir. I do not need to know more, for we already ask too much of you. This is a confirmation of the rumors which have already spread. Even when the elves are standing already fully on guard, we will mobilize extra wardens to the borders and inform Haldir of the events. You, however, have stayed here already for a decent time, and I know your company wishes to leave. Still, I cannot let you go, as your arm takes a long time to recover. Even longer than Nestadon had hoped for you."

Allyss remained on the background. Andraghil raises his voice to say something, while Losdirith watched him. It looks like he already has had his part in this audience before I arrived, and it looks like he relieved me of many questions. And still, I found it a strange audience, of which the purpose looked unclear. But now Andraghil spoke to the lady: "Galadriel, I have heard troubling news from my homeland and wish to depart as soon as we are allowed to. But I am afraid we will not make it with only the three of us. What should we do?"

And lady Galadriel decided: "Losdirith will accompany you one last time, and I will see that other elves will help you in your journey home. When the time has come, we will fortify you of food and medicines. Theogorn, when this time has come, Nestadon will give you further instructions regarding the medicines, as it will take countless days for your arm to close the wound. Andraghil, you and your company will take the shortest and safest route over the misty mountains. The choices are sparse, and we don't know enough about the treacherous white hand in the south. Since I will not send any Galadhrim into Moria, you will take the passes of Caradhras the cruel."
by Monbretia Umbridge on Aug 14, 2016 at 04:38 PM
It has been many sun rises since I wrote in my journal. Much has happened. Antani seem to have little time to dwell and open their minds to time unfolding. It seems to me they wish for everything now. They give no time for events to settle but hurtle onto the next. But I suppose that this comes from the blessing of mortality. Grasp the moment and bend the world to your will. Quick to adjust and create a new balance, though everything seems to be so unstable. But this does mean they can be quick of mind and nimble in adjustment.

I write tonight after our first kin meeting since our return from Imraldis. Many were present but not all. Ornessa of course is still in Imraldis and Aedree was not present. Strangely none of us spoke about what has happened but just seem to be happy to settle into the rebuilt kin hall.

Theogorn was there. I don’t think I have seen him in many moons. He spent the evening conversing with Katrandil about her family and friend Carrenhil. I think Theogorn was as confused as I have been by the extraordinary stories she has to tell. Calebriorn and I talked. I think for the first time. So much of our time together has been defending kin and fighting adversaries. We did not even talk much on the ride from Imraldis through Hollin. And then I split off from the party to speak to the tirith in both Echad Dunnan and Mirobel.
Calebriorn wanted to know how I have the skills that I have used. A strange question as I think they are rudimentary for a jobbing loremaster. I told him a little about studying in the halls of Thranduil, but much that I have learnt comes from the wisdom and knowlege of great uncles , aunts and cousins, Noldor , Sindar and Telari. I made him laugh when I told him that sometimes I climb up on the roofs of Bree and lie down to gaze at the stars. He offered to take time whenever we return to Imraldis to show me the stars to been seen there.

Blorio, bless him, busied himself in making everyone coffee and tea. I think there is still tension between him and Theogorn.
by Theogorn on Aug 09, 2016 at 04:43 PM
The elven bread worked, and I recovered soon. I was of course not strong enough to travel large distances, but gained in a couple of days at least the strength to get out of my bed to see my sister and my master. And, the audience wouldn't be far away anymore either. As ladders would be madness, I descended my tree with a winding staircase, turning around the trees in circles. I headed to the gardens of Galadriel, where the pavilion of my friends was located.

When my sister saw me, and when I saw her, we quickened our steps into a hurry, and hugged each other, as lightning hitting a tree. Yes, it was that intense, with so much of light and energy and speed and warmth, but in a fraternal way, though the high speed of the hug didn't affect its length that looked like seconds for us, and like hours for Andraghil. He, by the way, looked to us, raising one eyebrow, standing quite cool. I also gave him a hug, but in a 'proper' fraternal way how it can still be allowed from a servant to his master. "The Galadhrim didn't allow us to your resting place," Allyss sighed "but probably that was the best." And I eased her in return: "neither they allowed me to go downstairs. They wished to give me rest on a quiet place to quicken my recovering. But you, Andraghil, look restless. Tell me what is in your mind, for I finally feel, despite of my handicap, relieved about the turn of the tides"

"But I am not," Andraghil replied on my pretty confident indirect question "as the elves didn't bring me such hopeful news as they shared with you, it seems. While you recovered, bad news reached the town of the elves, concerning our order. You have fought for our order for many years, but much of our history and meaning is hidden for you. And now, our once so secret refuge is exposed due to the recent activities of the red company. Redstable burns..." Neither Allyss or I were aware of this development. While we have served as good militants and engaged for the blood of Númenor, we were ignorant of many things. Amarthorn told us about much of the history of Middle-Earth, about men and elves and dwarves alike, but he always refrained from telling large things about the history of Lady Rossiel. I was a piece in a big game of a thousand of years, but the secrets and our political situation were unknown for me. This, would now change, for my body is broken, my skill incapacitated, and my will strengthened. "Did there fall any casualties?! what is the aftermath?" "The news is rough, limited and unclear. We don't know how many, or who, but we know there were a few yes. I want to part homewards as soon as the elves let us go. But let it be known that my house suffered, and an important artefact, not solely belonging to us, but to all of Númernorean blood, has been destroyed. And I, Andraghil son of Amarthorn, am angered by the movements of the enemy and of my own house, for these actions couldn't be taken without conscience of Aragorn, son of Arathorn, chieftain of the Dúnedain, the only heir of the line of the kings."
by Theogorn on Aug 09, 2016 at 03:53 PM
I slowly awake. I saw a blur of stars and golden leaves. I was high among the trees, on one of these platforms the Galadrim call telains. I lied on a bed, in a somewhat transparant pavilion. It was night. It was only after some time that I realized what transpired the previous days and that I understood why I was here. The bed felt soft, and the pillowcases was one of these filled with feathers. Next to me was a little nightstand. Upon it stood a candle and a strange kind of bread, wrapped in leaves yet untouched.

As of the sudden, an elf came into the pavilion, fast but silent. From the moment he saw I was awake, he approached and sat down next to me. "Greetings, Theogorn Heolfling. How are you feeling?" He wispered, just like the leaves of the city. I looked up to him, in surprise and confusion, and forgot to answer his question in a rage of blunt incivility. "Who are you? and why am I here? and where is my sister? Or Andraghil? The black-haired fellow, grey eyes, Dúnedain heritage..."

"Forgive me, my lord, for not introducing myself. My name is Nestadon, and I am one of the healers in Caras Galadhon, capital of the lord and lady of the golden wood. We are high in the trees, on a secured talan, to obtain peace and silence and to allow you some sleep. You crossed the Anduin, but fainted while approaching the shore. The look-outs have escorted you to the city. Here, my lord tasked me to take care of your arm, which is now healing. Though I warn you, keep it quiet, for not all pain will be over. After that, you have fainted many times, doings of yourself you clearly weren't strong enough for to remember. We are now two days further, and it is only the first time you have awoken to witness your surroundings well enough. your friends have their own pavilion, on the ground level, close to the gardens of our lady. When I see you have strengthened sufficiently, I can consider to let you leave the Talan and join your allies in their own tent. For now, you surely need more rest and you need to eat. I laid some Lembas, elven waybread, on the nightstand. It is vital that you eat some of it, for you will regain much strength of it. I will now leave you, and fetch water for you from the fountain." After the monologue of Nestadon, the elf tarried during his leaving. "And, my guest, it relieves me you are awake!"

When I was alone again I thought about all of what Nestadon the elf has said. My arm hurth indeed. I had some feeling they burn my wright, but was not sure elves proceeded such practices. I was quite sure, even if they handled it this way, elves had other techniques to heal the wounded. Despite the pain, which lessened a lot compared to a few days ago, I hoped to leave as soon as possible. Sitting for days in a tree, doing nothing and resting, was nothing for me. I looked to the bandage, and the stump. I also realized the consequences of my madness. My fighting arm has ceased his job. Eventually, I will never fight again. It has cost me many years to build up the skill I had with my sword. Maybe I can try to learn fighting with my left hand? maybe? and then I needed some lad, some sort of squire, to buckle me shield on my right arm...Seriously?! I would be getting so low already?! It was a pity for my pillow, such a quality of a pillow, to already make it wet with tears.

After I was done crying (I could rub away the tears with only one hand), I took the hunk of waybread and took a bite. I also was an excellent archer. Many men did worse than me, but with only one hand left, it was entirely excluded. Under no circumstance, I would ever take up bow and arrow, unless this squire I though of also wished to string my bow for me. I left a little smile, thinking how odd that would like. Imagine, in the heat of battle, two men shooting with the same bow, everyone doing half of the work. one would string the bow, the other would loose the arrow. It would technically not even be possible to do that, and by that though my smile even grew bigger.

After smiling and crying and everything else, I realized that my trusted weapons were lost. My sword Fyrwine, rohirric for a friend of fire, or fiery friend, called after the color of my sisters hair and the bond between her and me, was still in the dungeons of Dol Guldur. And Gaertin, the red spark, the mallorn spear I got from the same elves in the same city here, shared its fate. They had an incredible meaning for me, not because I handled them for roughly 15 years, but because they remind me to my tutor, and to my sister. It was physically the closest remembrance to him!

Nestadon arrived again with a crock of water. "My apologies for staying away for so long with your drinking water, Theogorn. I was interupted. I send you the message that, as soon as you have recovered, the lord and lady request your presence."

by Theogorn on Aug 06, 2016 at 11:35 AM
So basically, did we have to do? Three men, two elves and a big Olog-hai. We were with 5, should we fight it. Anyway, the troll from his side already started to fight us instead. So we, from our side, started to string our bows and fired arrows. "Back, don't approach him!" One of the elves shouted. "We can't go back! Orcs are coming! If we don't hurry we'll be flanked!" Clamored Andraghil. The second elf drawed his sword and marched forward towards the troll. "Min..." "Hurry!" Andraghil interupted the words of the elf. The troll raised his mace and in quickening speed it fell down as a hamer on an anvil.

The poor elf caught the blow on his small buckler, which splintered in a thousend pieces. The other Galadrim lookout led the trio past the troll and they fled over bridges and more stairs, many steps into the sick woods. Only one other blow of the troll was heard, but the elf who resisted him was never seen again.

But that was not all of it. Soon they were chased by wargs and warg-riders. They were less though to deal with, for we had many arrows. Were it not that wargs could smell so well, we'd have hidden ourselves in the brightness of the woods. Were it not that orcs could throw javelins, we'd have climbed in trees. But were possible and neither of them were a solution. It was the wall of fire, made by our arrows, setting the dry and dead trees aflame, that saved us. So we made it to the anduin, and we crosses it with the small same boat my rescuers came with. I sat on the sit of the missing elf.

On the other shore of the great river, other elves of the Galadhrim awaited desperately the arrival of the rescuing company they sent out. "Allyss, Andraghil! Once we are in Caras Galadhon, you have to tell me many things, for I do not understand anymore what is going on!" Is this real? Or is this a nightmare? And why did they risk their lives?! Chance on succeeding was so unlikely. The elves have payed a soul of their own to save another... I don't even deserve this, for it is my own foolishness that brought me here. "First your arm, Theogorn..." I succumbed.
by Theogorn on Aug 06, 2016 at 10:44 AM
"What are you doing here?! Don't you see this darkness? The blackness represents the grade of evil!" The stranger who was hooded now unhooded himself; correction: herself. "Dont ask stupid questions," the voice said, "I am your sister, and you are my brother. For 32 year we have been one. We will be so today; and tomorrow. Raise, my brother, for we cannot stay here. It is dangerous indeed, and time cannot be bought forever." As reply, my whisper cried: "I can't!"

I started to shock. Tears started to arise in my eyes. Is it the emotion to see my greatest ally in a time of need after countless days of evil that was made for the purpose of destroying; or is it the relief to breath free air again in the captiving darkness that made time stand still; or is it the fear that my sister would befall the same fate as my lost soul did in dark ages which made me small and shy? With all effort, I leaned on my left hand; the other burned; to raise from the ground. Now, it was difficult, for tears fell like rivers of emotion, relief, fear, pain and exhaustion. I couldn't raise my right arm, it just hung on my body, needless, a remnant which has no purpose anymore. But the message was clear, and my sis grew pale as a soft morning sun. And she sent back a wordless message to me: tears in reply, and in return she needed to sit now, and breathed heavily.

"What...did they do to you?" And so brother and sister are in an unlocked cell in the darkness, grieving and relieving, while lives are being spent outside. And both raising, and hugged, and nothing like that had seen its alike. Wavering, she said: "We must go Lothlórien, the healer must handle the wound. We are now in the Dungeons of Dol Guldur. It are quite some miles to the Anduin." "Then let's hurry, we shall not tarry and spend any minute longer in this darkness. Let's meet the face of the moon!"

My sister, Allyss, picks up her bow and quiver which she dropped in grief. We run what is like hours through halls and tunnels, and we hear noises. Swords clash and steel crosses. The passage to the dungeons was defended all the time by Andraghil. My hearth is relieved once more, but the situation is dire and interaction is impossible. While my sister freed me, Andraghil and two elves with golden hair had made an epic stand here. We already tarried for too long and word has spread in Dol Guldur of the standings in the dungeons. Reinforcements would come soon, to spread a new curtain of evil and dark fire over us.

"The gate is near! A couple of stairs, then to the left!" Andraghil cried. "Hopefully the gate is still free! The worst, and hordes of the enemy await us there!" A horn of the orcs resounded over the courtyard, downstairs, to the dungeons and every other corner darkness left space. We are going upstairs, two or three stairs taking every step. And as we turned around the corner, there weren't hordes of orcs. Only a single annoyed and angered troll.

by Theogorn on Aug 02, 2016 at 05:30 PM
This hurts! I was thrown in the dungeon again. They, the orcs of these halls, brought me to a big room with high ceilings and it was more or less as dark as the prison; but in another tower wherein I was hidden from the darkest of the sky; to be exposed to practices darker still.

You remembered what I said..., even thought earlier? Was I gonna sucumb to starvation? Did I say that?! So the torture is a fact. Do I think so low and mindless to think like this? Is it just me to think that, despite this form of torture I got, this is far less cruel than any other type?

For Theogorn Heolfling, student of Amarthorn, servant of Andraghil, defender of Rossiels legacy and spearbrother of the red company, no fire to burn like an idolator; neither breaking on the weel is destined for me. I get swift hit, no more, no less. Only one.

It's my wrist that hurts so much. I barely dare to touch it; it hurts! Waterfalls stream in the color I pledged allegiance to. I know, if I don't get assistance quickly, I might well lose my entire bloody arm. The wound will rot and healthy flesh will these moggots affect. Someone must lend me a hand; they chopped hand.

Suddenly I heard noises in the dark. It was no orc for sure, for my jailor wouldn't be so hasty. Whoever it was, he unlocked my cell and I glanced to his face. I was terrified. You?!
by Aedree on Jul 26, 2016 at 11:06 PM
Dear Journal,

I've arived back home, only to discover we were setting off to Rivendel once more. It seemed Ornessar had brought the orb for safe keeping to Lord Elrond's house. After heavy debating it was agreed to have the orb destroyed. But for that we needed the wisdom of the elves.

So off we went again. I could've stayed behind, let the others see to it being done. And safe myself the agony of having to face them. Yet for some reason I didn't. I think I feel responsible for most of that has happened during our travelings, and somehow I needed to be there when the chapter closed.

Needless to say it did way heavy on my heart. Especially the confronting looks the others still gave me. And I tried to avoid Katrandil's pressence as much as I could. Once we were at the house of the elves we met again with Ornessar. And there was another female too, wearing our colors. She introduced herself as Keithia and after some talking I discovered she was recruited by Adilyr. I guess he failed to mention that to me, but on the other hand, it's not like I'm the leader of this band. But somehow given all that has happened lately, I do feel responsible for them.

Nonetheless, we were brought to Lord Elrond and after his advice went outside to use the light of the moon to help decipher the orb. I couldn't read it, but luckily some others of us could and appearantly it could indeed get destroyed, yet the shards would remain some of its powers. Radhril used her ring and together with Calebriorn's sword she managed to pierce it. And that was that.

The end of this small thing that had cost us so much. Grief, sorrow, pain. But also joy and a sense of freedom, of finally having it destroyed and this bain taken from us. It all melted into one.

The historian, Halduirin, took one of the shards. He wants to study it. I quickly made sure I collected all the others, before someone would run off with it. As Lord Elrond said, they still have some powers in them, and it wouldn't do any good to have it fallen into the wrong hands again.

I disposed the remaining shards, all but one. Blorlo asked if he could have it. But I honestly don't trust anyone at this point with it. Also, I'd like to keep this last shard as a reminder to myself, that even the smallest thing can make a huge difference. For better or for good.

Katrandil tried to approach me during our stay with the elves. She apologized several times. But it's just too soon for me. Radhril tried to talk with me as well about it, as did Blorlo. They stated it wasn't my fault, that they would've done the same thing if I hadn't done it earlier. But those kind words don't take away the pain.

And then Arstelle walked into the room and demanded to know the fate of the siblings, as she held them dear to her heart and didn't know their whereabouts. I honestly couldn't face her. So I kept silent as Calebriorn took word and told her of what had passed. Somehow he was so kind as to not tell her that it was me that shot them. Instead he said it was done by the dwarfs under Thalsori's lead. Still, Arstelle didn't seem to believe it and I'm quite sure she suspects me of having something to do with it. If only she finds out...

I honestly don't know what to do at this point. I find it hard to face the others, even those that believe my act was one out of kindness. The shame is just too much. Maybe it's better if I keep my distance for a while, try to clear my head. If the Valar deem it fit, get rid of this burden. Or else, with their wisdom, try to come to terms with it and accept whatever fate they have in store for me.

One can only hope...
by keithia on Jul 26, 2016 at 05:44 PM
(( page 1 the journey i will take the opportunity if it's alright to add the music that is typical keithia and me when she and i paint and write 😊~Namasté~ ))
I am not sure if all stories begins when it feels like the end but perhaps there is something about the first word in each story that makes you wonder if all stories will turn out to be an adventure on it's own.
Each word feels like a small step as when you turn the page in a book the foot steps continues.
I can imagen pebbles on a beach represents words that somehow has turned into a tale on it's own.

To look back at the beginning i always found it to be more comfortble it's own naturalness to being out in the woods then to tend to housework , chores and duties.
Our neighbours certainly found it unseemly a young girl running around naming birds and squirrels and being more fascinated with finding reflections of the sun in the pond then trying to create friends in my age but then again they were unsure how old i was since my uncle refused to discuss such matter.
" She is young enought" was his answer when someone was nosy.
Somehow i would like to believe we own a piece of broken glass that sheds a light a fragment in who we are.
Just like the leafs on the road that led me where i am staying.
They were shimmering in the sunlight like tiny tablets in diffrent colours covering the path that was leading down into the valley.
I just found my self looking into river studying the reflection of the sky in rivendell admiring it's noble beauty.
Perhaps i will stay just for a while before it's time to turn the page.
by Theogorn on Jul 21, 2016 at 12:04 PM
For hours, I was in a slumbering state. I was neither awake or asleep, but something in between I guess. I wished to be awake, but did not succeed. The obvious clarification for this is, whether I opened my eyes or not, it didn't make a difference. It is always dark here in this room. So dark that I could not see my own hand waving if I did so.

I don't know where I am. But I do know that this is not a nice place. Not at all... I also know that I'm already here for quite some time. Were it not for the thickening of my beard, I'd have forgotten all sense of time. And hungry I am. I am so hungry. I'd be worse than a hobbit by the smell of mushrooms! Although...this is not a good place to think about smells or food. Now, in this dark place, I sense the smell of death and decay.

I also realize that I lost my weapons. My fiery friend, where are you if I may ask?! Did they take you? And though I have clothes on my body, I know they are not my own. Did they seriously run off with everything?!

In this darkness and hunger and smell and poority, I tried to think about what transpired. Where was the sense of grass, the sound of water and the the smell of summer wind? Where was the feeling of love, the confort of friendship and the convenience of trust? All are forsaken, for I feel unloved, unbefriended and there's no trust in these halls. It feels like I'm bearing all burdens of the world alone. I feel terrible in the very experienced way, yet never done before. Regret and hate took me.

Why didn't Oromë save me? Béma in the tongue of my homeland, he has a big horse and is a hunter of monsters and could easily get me out. Why is here no open air, so Varda could enlighten my burdens by her stars? I wished that Lórien gave me nice dreams to soften the pain, or that Mandos just delivered me swift death. I think to Amarthorn, he whoms fate was hidden and who tutored me long ago. He thought me the martial arts, and the history and geography of the world. He told me about the Valar long ago and if not he told me about them, I'd have doubted their existence. And then Oromë was the only one for me and I'd have said his name in Rohirric tongue.

I wonder how my friends are faring. The people of the Red Company! I almost forgot them and they must have forgotten me! They must think I'm dead. When I left Redstable for this mission, I didn't let them know. It felt like a delicate matter and too many issues were around I guess. We couldn't miss any men, but if I told them, they'd have joined me... So I didn't tell them, and parted alone.

I traveled to Mirkwood. I searched for spiders, I wanted to investigate their venoms. I do this more often. I belief that some venoms can be used against our own enemies, or if we experiment with the draughts we could obtain healing effects or stronger resilience against the pestilences of the enemy. That is what I do, Amarthorn thaught me. As he was a hunter, one of the oldest and wisest of the children of Rosiel, he learned me the value to rely in the wild on various medicines, of which some were even past from elves to him, or to use poisons on our blades or arrow so that even the smallest cut is fatal. And I always believed him. How could I doubt about 184 years of experience?

But, in these foul woods, I was surprised by the orcs. Unfortunately, not all orcs are dumb and even amongst their foul breed I detected their cunning...too late. So where I am now, I do not know. Here's no hope for escape, rescue or victory. If the company knew where I would be, they might already have come, but they did not. I'm about to die, not by torture, but by starvation.

At least, in Redstable it would have been safe... Or isn't it? Suddenly I feel delighted by being pickpocketed by that little stealthy hobbit. And I wonder what has become of the visitor that learned him to read. I wonder how the ladies Carrenhil and Katrandil are faring, who I met shortly before my departure. And maybe Ancthelm finally found his brother? and I feel double now. I told Radhril, as we met each other in Moria, not to tell about my journey or passing. And the annoying dwarf which scolded me in the Prancing Pony? And then he stayed in our company, selling his wares? He was the rudest dwarf I've ever met, and I hope the company didn't have trouble with him anymore. Though this is the end for me, all of them have a long road ahead, and I hope my friends have good fortunes.

Suddenly a door opened. The darkness of the night blinded me. An orc came in, and I barely could see his face, but he smiled. Come here, you maggot!! I'm getting you out of your cage! We prepared a surprise for you...
by Aedree on Jul 20, 2016 at 04:19 PM
Dear Diary,

I seemed to have gained some favor from the Valar, despite my actions. It appears Katrandil is still alive. The moment I learned this, I didn't know what to feel. Joy, sadness, anger. It was like being a hobbit finding a stuffed pantry, not knowing what to taste first.

I'm glad that she's okay. At the same time I'm angry she forced me to shoot her. Angry that she of all the people there, chose me to use as the one to drop the axe. Well, to fire off that arrow. After what I did earlier at the gates of Moria, she picked me to do the job. Why?! Hadn't I already suffered enough? Or was my image of being a kinslayer what made her go after me? Was it her way of punishing me for my deeds?

The group has left the tunnels of Moria and are on their way home. I'm following behind. Right now I have no desire to speak with any of them. See their judgement on their faces, hear their sharp tongues speak ill words or look into their eyes and even feel more ashamed than I already do. I don't need their judging. I'm already judging myself.

I can only wonder what will happen when we get back home. How will the others of our kin react when they hear of what has happened? No doubt I will be judged further.

But Bree is my home. If I am to go elsewhere, I need to get rid of my house first. Sell my belongings and then set off to wherever I can find some peace. Because right now I've got nothing left but the clothes on my body, my bow and arrows and a few items in the saddle bag of my horse. If I want to make a new living elsewhere I need the money. And Bree is where my money is at.

by Aedree on Jul 20, 2016 at 04:10 PM
Dear Diary,

I've done it again! I've shot Katrandil... She ordered me and I shot her...

Everything is such a blur. One moment we were trying to rescue her from the scorcerer and his evil band. The next thing we see Katrandil being welcomed by them. She turns and looks at us.. this blank expression in her eyes.. her face showing nothing. Someone holds a knife to her throat, and I'm lowering my bow, making sure not to make the same mistake - if it was a mistake with the siblings, but none the less - twice. But then she looks at me and for a moment she seems herself again. She looks me into my eyes, opens her mouth and says 'Shoot me!'.

I refuse... I don't want to have another dead kinmember on my consience. I'm already torn up heavily by my last actions. Her blood on my hands will definately make it worse. But she goes on 'Trust me, just shoot me!'. What to do? Should I shoot or not?

Others react immediately, shouting I shouldn't, trying to reach Katrandil. But the knife against her throat begins to cut, I can see blood showing. And she keeps looking at me and again speaks those dreadful words. 'Shoot me'.

So I shoot. But Ornessar blocks my arrow. I nock another one and fire it off and again it is being blocked by him. He's raging, shouting at me, calling me names. The others are desperate too, trying franticly to either block me or rescue Katrandil. And she just keeps staring at me, her eyes piercing mine, ordering me, directing me. She wants this... there is no other way.

I nock two arrows, close my eyes and let them go. I hear a loud thump. Calebriorn lets out a cry and when I open my eyes I see both him and Katrandil lying on the ground. The man that held her at knife point lies dead on top of her. I see Radhril rushing towards the scorcerer. Ornessar is raging with madness, there is blood everywhere. And then it becomes a blur.

I can't really tell what happened next. Only that I found myself hours later, sitting in the snow. Death was everywhere around me. The occassional cry of one of the wounded would break the silence. And then there is the cold. Not just the wind and the snow. But the one inside me too. It has numbed me and all I can think of is how right the others were. I am a kinslayer. Now I've shot at four of those that took me in, made me feel part of their family. And three of them are dead.

I don't know where to go. I doubt the others would let me follow them back home. Or what ever is still left of our home. And I doubt that it will remain a home for me. I've done too much damage, have caused too much grieve. Whatever good was in me, has gone. I shall feel no more rest nor comfort. No more joy or share in laughter. No more, unless the Valar grand me some shred of opportunity to redeem myself. Though right now, my fate is just.

by Aedree on Jul 20, 2016 at 03:47 PM
Dear Diary

I'm struggling heavily, trying to cope with things that happened during the recent journey of our kin to reclaim the orb. Someone suggested to me to write it down, get my thoughts straightened out. I'm not much of a writer, but so far nothing else seems to work, so I'm going to give it a try.

I am a kinslayer.... there, I've said it. And nothing can change it nor bring back the dead. I wish I could, I honestly do. But circumstances forced me. To summarize in short: while we were traveling to Moria, we encountered Thalsori, that lowlive scum of a dwarf that sold us out to our enemies, raided our kinhouse and burned it down. But as we tried to bring justice to him, it turned out he had two of our kinsmen with him: Cenhaith and Awenil. I believe they were siblings, if I recall it correctly, and they were sent to us by Arstelle to help us out. Cenhaith we lost when he went treasure hunting as we camped somewhere along the road. And Awenil we met in Rivendel, though I thought she'd left the party once it set off to Moria. In any case, they were being held hostage by Thalsori and his illustrous band of dwarfs, and they were beaten up pretty good. In particular Cenhaith looked more dead than alive.

So we were at a stand-off. Either go after Thalsori, but have the siblings killed. Or try and safe the hostages but lose Thalsori again. And that's where I made my decision. Cenhaith was in too worse of a shape and I had no doubt that even if we could safe him, he would die within hours after the rescue. And Awenil looked not a whole lot better. So that's when I shot them. I showed them mercy, gave them a quick death. Because that's what I would do to a severly wounded animal. And no, they weren't animals. But it was the best I could offer them under these circumstances.

Needless to say ever since my decision, a rift has sparked between me and the rest of the group. Calebriorn has spoken harsh words, others simply ignore me. I get the feeling I'm turning into an outlaw now. That I am to blame for their wounds, even though it was Thalsori that took them and it was him that tortured them to their final state they were in when we met them. None of the others seem to understand my decision. Let alone that I'm torn up by it as much as they are. If I could've saved them, I would have. But I couldn't. None of us could.

I can't foresee the future or what happens next. Right now we're in the tunnels of Moria. Katrandil is acting more strange as we get closer to our final destination. I can only hope that our mission will succeed and won't ask any further prices to pay of us. And I hope that at some point I won't be seen as an outlaw anymore. But I guess only time will tell.


This is the beginning of Aedree's journal. I've created it to show you how she perceives certain affairs or happenings while roleplaying my character. Also it gives you an insight into her thoughts and feelings.
This Journal is meant to be used as Out of Character (OOC) knowledge only. Unless your character was with Aedree at the time something occured that she's writing about here or when she's spoken In Character with your character about how she feels or what she thinks, you are not allowed to use any of these writings during roleplay whenever your character meets Aedree. Having that said, I do hope you enjoy the read.